Dr. Crowder shared the following in a letter to future Living Waters Region Clergy on Thursday, Feb. 5.
Beloved Colleagues,
Over my 30-plus years of pastoring, I have learned that some relationships are transactional. I was reminded of this truth again recently. While I was “the pastor” or “the manager,” some connections flowed easily—calls were returned, invitations extended, concern expressed. When the role changed, so did the relationships. What I once assumed was mutual care was, in some cases, simply proximity to position.
This realization was sobering—even painful. Yet it was also clarifying.
Scripture reminds us that Jesus, too, was surrounded by crowds who loved the benefits of his presence—healing, bread, access—yet disappeared when the cost of discipleship became real. Even in holy work, not every relationship is rooted in covenant; some are rooted in convenience.
The good news is this: when transactional relationships end, they make room for transformational ones to emerge. God has a way of pruning—not to punish us, but to free us. What remains after the transaction ends is often truer, deeper, and more mutual. These are the relationships that see us not for what we provide, but for who we are.
Today’s invitation is not to resent what fell away, but to bless it—and to give thanks for what stayed.
